Okay, this is my first new movie review of 2013! And how was it? Uh...
Okay, so Dark Skies stars Felicity, a MLB player, a Phantom Menace-Anakin Skywalker look alike, and Generic Horror Movie Kid. They play this suburban family that keeps having weird stuff happen to them, eventually leading to the conclusion that aliens are stalking them. There you have it.
And how was this Insidious rip-off. Yeah, funny that I know its a rip-off in spite of having never seen Insidious (go ahead and hate me all you want). The answer to the aforementioned question is... okay. Let me explain: this movie is 1 hour and 40 minutes long. The first hour and 20 minutes are not good at all. The best way to describe them is narmy, or full of narm.
What is narm you ask? Narm is when something that's supposed to be dramatic or scary (the latter, in this case) is executed so terribly due to bad directing or bad delivery or the fact that it was just silly to begin with (all three in this case, folks) that it becomes unintentionally funny. And believe me you, that happened a lot in this movie. The sheer number of times I laughed, along with my friend and everyone else in the theater laughed is absurd. It got to the point where it became acceptable to start making Mystery Science Theater-esque snarky comments (granted, the fact that most of the audience was teenagers might've had something to do with that) about the absurdity we were watching. And that was more entertaining then the movie at that point. Maybe it didn't help that the last trailer before the movie started was for Scary Movie 5. Yeah, not a good way to set the tone. If they'd stopped with the add for The Last Exorcism Part 2 maybe, but... you get the idea.
It wasn't even really the fault of the actors, either (except the little kid, he was a crap actor). Kari Russel was good in this, she acted like she was trying to give this thing some actual credibility. Josh Hamilton (not the same guy) and the kid from Real Steel were fine, too. The directing and the writing were the biggest problem, especially the writing. It's written and directed by the same guy, and he's a better director. Heck, in terms of set design and visuals, the directing is fine, it's just he made the actors deliver a lot of lines badly. And a lot of the script is just silly. That's why I kept laughing, because a lot of the stuff that he wrote to scare the audience made said audience laugh, and that's the biggest problem the movie has. Narm.
In this narm-fest there are one or two moments that were kind of off-putting, but not really. Not enough to make me stop laughing anyway.
But then we get to the last twenty minutes, the climax, for all intents and purposes, of the movie and it became a horror movie. It was legitimately scary. My hearty rate was up and I wanted to look away but I couldn't bring myself to, which is what I want to happen when I watch a horror movie. The scares were finally done well and not narmy, I was freaked out, I really was. There was a general air of fear going around. The rest of the audience seemed to agree, too, because there was no more MST3K-ing at that point, and I even heard one or two people scream. I don't want to spoil it... but I will say that the main plot points and concepts finally became relevant and came home and... came to fruition, I guess. The ending wasn't perfect though, because at the very end, like in the last two minutes, the movie kind of explained itself in a way that just came off as wicked condescending. And then the very very end happened, and I was freaked out again.
The question is, is it worth $10 dollars to see a movie that's 80% laughably bad and 20% terrifying? Answer: No, its not. I'm actually sort of proud of the fact that I used a movie pass to see this and didn't actually support it with my money. If its on cable or Netflix Instant (which it probably will be in like a month) or MAYBE if you need to see a movie this weekend and you don't think anything else looks good and its a matinee, then fine, go ahead and watch it, you might like it more then I did.
And, I actually had to create a whole new rating for this one. Its between Fun Time-Killer and Avoid Paying To See It. Here you go:
Ladies and Gentlemen, Dark Skies might make good background noise.
So, Dark Skies; have you seen it, what did you think of it? Comment below, let me know!
Friday, February 22, 2013
Top 10 Animated Series
Okay, I am doing this list for no reason whatsoever other then I'm bored and I like cartoons. Needs no further explanation. So yeah.
Also, just a quick note, if you notice the high concentration of super hero cartoons... we'll that's just what I grew up watching. You didn't? Well this is a top 10 list, it's where I get to be wicked biased. So yeah. Moving on.
10. Futurama
Ah Futurama. The cancellation of which is another example of why FOX sucks. Basically, pizza boy Phil Fry accidently winds up in a cryogenic freezer and wakes up in the year 3000. The show from there follows his cosmic adventures on his descendants spaceship with his friends Bender the robot and Leela the cyclops. The show has the same style of humor as the Simpsons (it was created by Matt Groening, so that's kind of a foregone conclusion) while also being a sci fi show, which shouldn't work when you think about it, but it just does. And really well, too, because it's hilarious. And FOX cancelled. Because they suck. And Comedy Central brought it back. Because they're awesome.teen
9. Teen Titans
Ah, nostalgia. This was basically the show I was raised on, and I still love it to this day. Based DC's best-selling title of the same name, Teen Titans is, well, a team of teenage superheroes, featuring Robin, Beast Boy, Cyborg, Raven, and Starfire. The show was best known for two things: creating Meriquanime (the fusion of western and anime style art design, though they kept all the weirdness associated with the later, much to my delight) and having Ron Pearlman voice Slade Wilson, which may've actually been the greatest thing ever. The show was just the right combination of hilarious and epic at the same time and was very much a big part of my childhood.
8. Young Justice
Ladies and gentlemen, lets celebrate a show that has... what, three weeks left to live? Yes, that other show about a team of teenage DC superheroes (this time Robin, Superboy, Kid Flash, Aqualad, Miss Martian, and Artemis, at least at first, they have since... expanded their roster, shall we say), the one that just keeps getting screwed over via constant hiatuses, general executive meddling, and the recent anouncment that they're being cancelled in favor of a CGI Batman. What is wrong with Cartoon Network? But don't let that discourage from checking out this great big pile of awesome, which includes some of the best executed action sequences any cartoon has ever had, ever. Get whelmed.
7. Spongebob Squarepants
Need I explain. Okay, fine, this show was, at one point, freaking hilarious, no matter what your age is. The only real reason this isn't higher on the list is because some time, I think around 2006, it quite epiclly jumped thoe shark. No, that's an understatement; it flew over the shark at 37,000 feet and then crashed to the ground and burned. But hey, at one point mayonnaise was an instrument.
6. Robot Chicken
It's like Seth Green and Matt Senreich once thought "Hey, we've got ADHD, and we still play with toys. Let's make a show out of it!" And I'm glad they did. Robot Chicken is basically a ten minute long weekly show that does a series of stop-motion vignettes of pop-culture, usually no more then 45 seconds each, using toys and action figures... with a demented twist. Said twist is the show's bizarre, somewhat sick sense of humor (some of the things they make the toys do may or may not disturb emotionally) that makes me laugh of so much. They recently concluded their sixth season, which, among other things, included a DC comics special (a sort of follow up to their spectacular three part Star Wars special). And it was awesome. Things are all set for season 7. Bear warning, if you're at all interested in jumping on board, this is the single weirdest show on TV... ever.
5. Batman Beyond
It shouldn't have worked. But it did. It do oh so very much. Forty years into the future (okay, about thirty at this point), Bruce Wayne is old. Like, he needs a cain to walk old. Enter stage Terry McGinnis, who Bruce trains to become the new Batman amidst the crime of Neo-Gotham. And it was awesome. And it culminated in the greatest direct to video movie ever made, Batman Beyond: Return of the Joker (heads up, it's freaking disturbing).
4. Batman: The Animated Series
Some have tried to make the case that this is the greatest incarnation of Batman outside of the comics. I think people with that opinion have really got an argument there. Plus, Mark Hammil as the Joker.
3. The Simpsons
'Nuff said.
2. Avatar: The Last Air Bender
When I was a kid (okay, a younger kid), this was the show that my dad sat down to watch with me and my sisters. Heck, it was the show my sisters sat down to watch with me. Because it's that awesome. You probably already know what the show's about (if you don't, where have you been?), and you therefore know how awesome it is in every way, from the action to the humor to the story lines to the characters to the animation style. It's just... epic. I miss it so much. Oh well, there's always the Legend of Korra.
1. Justice League Unlimited
After creating Batman: The Animated Series, Superman: The Animated Series, and Batman Beyond, Bruce Timm took on the immense challenge of creating a Justice League TV show. Said TV show's became evidence to Timm's genius. The show was simply "Justice League" for two seasons, with only Superman, Batman, Wonder Woman, Flash, Green Lantern, Hawkgirl, and Martian Manhunter as members. Then in season three they relaunched as Justice League Unlimited, incorporating nearly every character the DC universe has seen. And it was the single greatest animated series of all time, adapting the best parts of the DC universe into the amazing CADMUS story line, as well as putting a unique spin on classic heroes. And I loved every second of it. Plus, Michael Rosenbaum was the the Flash.
Alright, those are my picks, what are yours? Comment below, let me know!
Also, just a quick note, if you notice the high concentration of super hero cartoons... we'll that's just what I grew up watching. You didn't? Well this is a top 10 list, it's where I get to be wicked biased. So yeah. Moving on.
Ah Futurama. The cancellation of which is another example of why FOX sucks. Basically, pizza boy Phil Fry accidently winds up in a cryogenic freezer and wakes up in the year 3000. The show from there follows his cosmic adventures on his descendants spaceship with his friends Bender the robot and Leela the cyclops. The show has the same style of humor as the Simpsons (it was created by Matt Groening, so that's kind of a foregone conclusion) while also being a sci fi show, which shouldn't work when you think about it, but it just does. And really well, too, because it's hilarious. And FOX cancelled. Because they suck. And Comedy Central brought it back. Because they're awesome.teen
9. Teen Titans
8. Young Justice
Need I explain. Okay, fine, this show was, at one point, freaking hilarious, no matter what your age is. The only real reason this isn't higher on the list is because some time, I think around 2006, it quite epiclly jumped thoe shark. No, that's an understatement; it flew over the shark at 37,000 feet and then crashed to the ground and burned. But hey, at one point mayonnaise was an instrument.
6. Robot Chicken
5. Batman Beyond
Some have tried to make the case that this is the greatest incarnation of Batman outside of the comics. I think people with that opinion have really got an argument there. Plus, Mark Hammil as the Joker.
3. The Simpsons
'Nuff said.
2. Avatar: The Last Air Bender
When I was a kid (okay, a younger kid), this was the show that my dad sat down to watch with me and my sisters. Heck, it was the show my sisters sat down to watch with me. Because it's that awesome. You probably already know what the show's about (if you don't, where have you been?), and you therefore know how awesome it is in every way, from the action to the humor to the story lines to the characters to the animation style. It's just... epic. I miss it so much. Oh well, there's always the Legend of Korra.
1. Justice League Unlimited
Alright, those are my picks, what are yours? Comment below, let me know!
Saturday, February 16, 2013
Arrow: The Odyssey Review
Ladies and gentlemen, it's official: Arrow has grown the beard.
Spoilers follow.
Okay, I don't know if the writers planned this or they're making it up as they go and they just picked up on the fact that everyone loves the flashbacks, but long story short, after confronting his mother in costume, Arrow hesitates, only to take a bullet. From his mom. He manages to get away and winds up having Felicity of all people drag him back to the Arrow Cave (wouldn't the Quiver make much more sense?), where she and Diggle operate on him, thus giving us an excuse to spend most of the episode in Ollie's memories, exploring the early days of his time with Slade Wilson on the island. And it was awesome.
For awhile, my biggest complaint about the show, save for Thea, has been that they're under-using the island flashbacks. As a result, this episode won me over pretty quick. The main point is Slade training Oliver (who, if you hadn't worked it out by now, at that point was basically a priss) so they can hijack the supply plane. Manu Bennet as Slade... holy crap! This guy was amazing as Slade. He kicked an absurd amount of ass, he really toughened Oliver up (which was a little weird, given that the two are always bitter enemies in the comics. Maybe they're going for a Professor X-Magneto thing), and he just perfectly embodied the whole rugged soldier thing. Do we know if he's actually going to be Deathstroke (who is one of my favorite comic book villains ever, like in the top five, by the way)? Not yet, but that's just a testament to the fact that island flashbacks are really complicated (what is about islands and flashbacks that makes shows so complex?).
Basically, Slade's awesome (now if only they could get Seth Gabel to dial back on the Count, and they'll have executed all three villains that make of GA's rogues gallery well). And as a result, he lead to some sweet action scenes, which continue to improve steadily with each episode. Even Island-Oliver had a BAMF moment at the end.
Even though Slade stole the show, Oliver was great too. For me personally, its the first time I've really been able to see how the guy on the island could become the guy in Starling City, as the flashbacks show him starting to take a level in badass. Not only that, but I really liked two moments he had: when he got to call Laurel and had this silent breakdown, which was about as effective as they come, and when he went back for Yao Fei. He's nothing if not loyal, even though Yao Fei's working for Fyres. We know why that is, too. They have his daughter, who's got the same tatoo as Oliver does. Curious. My guess is she's China White, but who knows what could happen.
Only real complaint is when Billy Wintergreen (the guy in the Deathstroke mask who tortured Oliver) talked. He's played by a stuntman, so yeah. Granted, the fight between him and Slade was awesome, but still.
Even though most of the episode was flashback, some good stuff happened in the present, too. Thus far, I've been a fan of Felicity, so I'm pretty happy that she's brought onto the team, and she and Diggle had some great dialogue, especially when Dig recounted the worst thing he's ever done.
The bottom line is this is the best episode of the show so far, and I'm liking it more and more each week.
Final Rating: 95%
Spoilers follow.
Okay, I don't know if the writers planned this or they're making it up as they go and they just picked up on the fact that everyone loves the flashbacks, but long story short, after confronting his mother in costume, Arrow hesitates, only to take a bullet. From his mom. He manages to get away and winds up having Felicity of all people drag him back to the Arrow Cave (wouldn't the Quiver make much more sense?), where she and Diggle operate on him, thus giving us an excuse to spend most of the episode in Ollie's memories, exploring the early days of his time with Slade Wilson on the island. And it was awesome.
For awhile, my biggest complaint about the show, save for Thea, has been that they're under-using the island flashbacks. As a result, this episode won me over pretty quick. The main point is Slade training Oliver (who, if you hadn't worked it out by now, at that point was basically a priss) so they can hijack the supply plane. Manu Bennet as Slade... holy crap! This guy was amazing as Slade. He kicked an absurd amount of ass, he really toughened Oliver up (which was a little weird, given that the two are always bitter enemies in the comics. Maybe they're going for a Professor X-Magneto thing), and he just perfectly embodied the whole rugged soldier thing. Do we know if he's actually going to be Deathstroke (who is one of my favorite comic book villains ever, like in the top five, by the way)? Not yet, but that's just a testament to the fact that island flashbacks are really complicated (what is about islands and flashbacks that makes shows so complex?).
Basically, Slade's awesome (now if only they could get Seth Gabel to dial back on the Count, and they'll have executed all three villains that make of GA's rogues gallery well). And as a result, he lead to some sweet action scenes, which continue to improve steadily with each episode. Even Island-Oliver had a BAMF moment at the end.
Even though Slade stole the show, Oliver was great too. For me personally, its the first time I've really been able to see how the guy on the island could become the guy in Starling City, as the flashbacks show him starting to take a level in badass. Not only that, but I really liked two moments he had: when he got to call Laurel and had this silent breakdown, which was about as effective as they come, and when he went back for Yao Fei. He's nothing if not loyal, even though Yao Fei's working for Fyres. We know why that is, too. They have his daughter, who's got the same tatoo as Oliver does. Curious. My guess is she's China White, but who knows what could happen.
Only real complaint is when Billy Wintergreen (the guy in the Deathstroke mask who tortured Oliver) talked. He's played by a stuntman, so yeah. Granted, the fight between him and Slade was awesome, but still.
Even though most of the episode was flashback, some good stuff happened in the present, too. Thus far, I've been a fan of Felicity, so I'm pretty happy that she's brought onto the team, and she and Diggle had some great dialogue, especially when Dig recounted the worst thing he's ever done.
The bottom line is this is the best episode of the show so far, and I'm liking it more and more each week.
Final Rating: 95%
Monday, February 11, 2013
The Walking Dead: The Suicide King Review
Ladies and gentlemen, where the true horrors of war happen: the home-er... prison-front.
Spoilers follow
Alright, last night TWD came back from a three month hiatus with a vengeance. I've been missing this show so much since episode 7's cliffhanger, which is exactly where the episode picks up. Daryl and Merle are cornered by the Governor, who wants them to fight to the death, which starts to happen until our heroes arrive and bail them out in a sweet but disappointingly short second raid. They start going back to the prison whilst Woodbury is in chaos. And now for the aftermath.
Long story short, Rick-and Glenn- refuse to take Merle back to the prison, so Daryl goes on the road with him. I had mixed feelings about that because I didn't want him to leave the group, but I know that him abandoning his brother to survive on his own would've felt wicked contrived. And judging by the promos for the next episode, the fact that Norman Reedus is still in the opening credits, and the fact that Michael Rooker isn't anymore... well, take a guess. Hey, I could be wrong, but I could also be right. Here's hoping Daryl does it.
Back at the prison everyone is reeling from what just happened: Glenn is pissed (I'm done) and probably is gonna do something stupid but awesome, he and Maggie are barely talking, and Rick is... we'll get to that later. Carol sure come a long way, judging by her conversation with Beth (who, in spite of my initial groans, the writers have actually found a decent amount to do for), which is good, given the show's track record with female characters. And I just like to point out that they actually mentioned Oscar is dead. Nobody actually seemed to care to much save for Axl, but hey, at least they didn't never bring him up again. Granted, he'll never get brought up again from this point on, but still.
And now onto the new token black character. We'll hopefully not so much on the token part, as he seems like a solid character thus far. Yeah, Tyronne is basically Rick except still sane (again, more on that later). In other words, what Rick was in season 2. He's even sort of got a Shane. Basically, he comes off as a reasonable guy, and as much as I want Rick to accept him and let him and his group integrate, I know he's not gonna. I still like where things are going with Tyronne and his group though, and I'm looking forward to seeing where it goes.
Michonne said literally nothing the whole episode. If you're one of many who don't like her, you may've been pleased by that. I, on the other hand, was kinda curious to see where the character goes after her little emotional breakdown in the last episode. But nothing. Andrea on the other hand... dear God, Andrea is an idiot. See, as usual, the prison scenes were better then the Woodbury scenes. The Governor's apparent sanity slippage was cool, and I want to see more of the that, but the rest of the town... their actions were reasonable, I guess, but it was honestly ridiculous that Andrea's corny speech was enough calm everyone down.
Back at the prison we have Rick, who's not only hallucinating Lori's voice, but now her body (in a white dress, no less). Disturbing? Yes. Wicked cool? Hell yes. His break down at the end of the episode, fueled some great acting, was fantastic, and I REALLY wanna see where this goes, especially because I thought that not enough attention was paid to his insanity scenes in the first half of the season.
All in all, TWD came back strong, and I can't wait for next week.
Final Rating: 85%
Spoilers follow
Alright, last night TWD came back from a three month hiatus with a vengeance. I've been missing this show so much since episode 7's cliffhanger, which is exactly where the episode picks up. Daryl and Merle are cornered by the Governor, who wants them to fight to the death, which starts to happen until our heroes arrive and bail them out in a sweet but disappointingly short second raid. They start going back to the prison whilst Woodbury is in chaos. And now for the aftermath.
Long story short, Rick-and Glenn- refuse to take Merle back to the prison, so Daryl goes on the road with him. I had mixed feelings about that because I didn't want him to leave the group, but I know that him abandoning his brother to survive on his own would've felt wicked contrived. And judging by the promos for the next episode, the fact that Norman Reedus is still in the opening credits, and the fact that Michael Rooker isn't anymore... well, take a guess. Hey, I could be wrong, but I could also be right. Here's hoping Daryl does it.
Back at the prison everyone is reeling from what just happened: Glenn is pissed (I'm done) and probably is gonna do something stupid but awesome, he and Maggie are barely talking, and Rick is... we'll get to that later. Carol sure come a long way, judging by her conversation with Beth (who, in spite of my initial groans, the writers have actually found a decent amount to do for), which is good, given the show's track record with female characters. And I just like to point out that they actually mentioned Oscar is dead. Nobody actually seemed to care to much save for Axl, but hey, at least they didn't never bring him up again. Granted, he'll never get brought up again from this point on, but still.
And now onto the new token black character. We'll hopefully not so much on the token part, as he seems like a solid character thus far. Yeah, Tyronne is basically Rick except still sane (again, more on that later). In other words, what Rick was in season 2. He's even sort of got a Shane. Basically, he comes off as a reasonable guy, and as much as I want Rick to accept him and let him and his group integrate, I know he's not gonna. I still like where things are going with Tyronne and his group though, and I'm looking forward to seeing where it goes.
Michonne said literally nothing the whole episode. If you're one of many who don't like her, you may've been pleased by that. I, on the other hand, was kinda curious to see where the character goes after her little emotional breakdown in the last episode. But nothing. Andrea on the other hand... dear God, Andrea is an idiot. See, as usual, the prison scenes were better then the Woodbury scenes. The Governor's apparent sanity slippage was cool, and I want to see more of the that, but the rest of the town... their actions were reasonable, I guess, but it was honestly ridiculous that Andrea's corny speech was enough calm everyone down.
Back at the prison we have Rick, who's not only hallucinating Lori's voice, but now her body (in a white dress, no less). Disturbing? Yes. Wicked cool? Hell yes. His break down at the end of the episode, fueled some great acting, was fantastic, and I REALLY wanna see where this goes, especially because I thought that not enough attention was paid to his insanity scenes in the first half of the season.
All in all, TWD came back strong, and I can't wait for next week.
Final Rating: 85%
Saturday, February 9, 2013
The Departed Movie Review
First classic movie review of 2013! Woo! Granted, this only came out like five years ago so I'm not sure you can really call it a classic, but in my mind it is. So yeah.
No spoilers, don't worry.
Okay, so I need to review more older movies, and why not start with one of my favorite movies. So, The Departed stars Leonardo Dicaprio, Matt Damon, Marky-Mark, Jack Nicholson, Alec Baldwin, Martin Sheen, and Kristen Wig. Whether or not any of them other than Damon and Whalberg can actually do a Boston accent is up to you.
Basically, Jack Nicholson plays a mob boss in Boston fending off the State Police, Matt Damon plays Jack Nicholson's mole inside the Massachusetts State Police, and Marky-Mark and Sygon play State Police officials who get state cop Leonardo Dicaprio- who's family has ties to the mob- to their mole in Jack Nicholson's organization. Long story short, Damon and Dicaprio spend the movie trying to figure out who the rats are in their respective organizations that they're rats for. And thus begins one of the most epic cat and mouse games ever.
I'll start with the obvious thing to talk about: the acting. Everyone is so good in this movie. Matt Damon's great, obviously; Jack Nicholson's great and, in all seriousness, probably didn't know he was being filmed (him, Liam Neeson, and Bryan Cranston are the actors who I'm convinced never know they're being filmed. It's more like "Guys, Jack Nicholson's doing stuff, quick, get a camera, we'll put it in something); Marky-Mark... played himself, and that's always fun to watch; Dicaprio's really good in this, and I think part of that is he's not playing his usual character, you like the whole tortured soul schtick he's famous for. In this he's this really angry jerkass. And it was awesome. Martin Sheen, 'nough said.
Kristen Wig and Alec Baldwin weren't in it much, they were good when they were it in, and Baldwin had a couple of absolutely hysterical lines, the only problem was that out of everyone, they had the worst Boston accents. Especially Kristen Wig, because half the time it's like she didn't know she was supposed to be doing an accent and just spoke sans, and the other half she had one. They weren't awful, and if you've never been to Boston you might actually be fooled by them, but I live in Boston (well, suburb of Boston). I'm weathering one of Boston's many snowstorms as I write this. I know what a good accent sounds like. Again, it wasn't awful, just took me out of the movie a few times.'
This is basically the epitome of a dialogue driven mob movie. There are a few action scenes, one shout out in last act, and they're really good, but that's not the point. The point is the awesome dialogue. It is a lot like Pulp Fiction that way, because the dialogue carries the movie, and there are times when it's wicked funny but other times when it's wicked dramatic. The entire time it's entertaining though. If you like good dialogue/if you like Pulp Fiction, you will love this, is what I'm saying. It does, however, out do Pulp Fiction in terms of the sheer number of f-bombs dropped per minute. Didn't think that was possible either.
It was directed by Martin Scorsese, and I shouldn't need to explain that, but I will: he REALLY out did himself with this movie. It's that awesome. Almost everything about the direction is perfect, especially the way the scenes flow into each other. This may not make sense, or may be you didn't notice it when you saw it, but when I watched it, the scenes and the shots flowed together so well it was like the movie was moving at a million miles per hour. Which is good, because it's two and a half hours long. Part of it is the script is that good, part of it is the shots are so long, and part of is I don't know. But it really enhances the movie.
The bottom line is that The Departed is an awesome movie that you should all see if you haven't already.
In the end, I saw The Departed and there was much rejoicing.
No spoilers, don't worry.
Okay, so I need to review more older movies, and why not start with one of my favorite movies. So, The Departed stars Leonardo Dicaprio, Matt Damon, Marky-Mark, Jack Nicholson, Alec Baldwin, Martin Sheen, and Kristen Wig. Whether or not any of them other than Damon and Whalberg can actually do a Boston accent is up to you.
Basically, Jack Nicholson plays a mob boss in Boston fending off the State Police, Matt Damon plays Jack Nicholson's mole inside the Massachusetts State Police, and Marky-Mark and Sygon play State Police officials who get state cop Leonardo Dicaprio- who's family has ties to the mob- to their mole in Jack Nicholson's organization. Long story short, Damon and Dicaprio spend the movie trying to figure out who the rats are in their respective organizations that they're rats for. And thus begins one of the most epic cat and mouse games ever.
I'll start with the obvious thing to talk about: the acting. Everyone is so good in this movie. Matt Damon's great, obviously; Jack Nicholson's great and, in all seriousness, probably didn't know he was being filmed (him, Liam Neeson, and Bryan Cranston are the actors who I'm convinced never know they're being filmed. It's more like "Guys, Jack Nicholson's doing stuff, quick, get a camera, we'll put it in something); Marky-Mark... played himself, and that's always fun to watch; Dicaprio's really good in this, and I think part of that is he's not playing his usual character, you like the whole tortured soul schtick he's famous for. In this he's this really angry jerkass. And it was awesome. Martin Sheen, 'nough said.
Kristen Wig and Alec Baldwin weren't in it much, they were good when they were it in, and Baldwin had a couple of absolutely hysterical lines, the only problem was that out of everyone, they had the worst Boston accents. Especially Kristen Wig, because half the time it's like she didn't know she was supposed to be doing an accent and just spoke sans, and the other half she had one. They weren't awful, and if you've never been to Boston you might actually be fooled by them, but I live in Boston (well, suburb of Boston). I'm weathering one of Boston's many snowstorms as I write this. I know what a good accent sounds like. Again, it wasn't awful, just took me out of the movie a few times.'
This is basically the epitome of a dialogue driven mob movie. There are a few action scenes, one shout out in last act, and they're really good, but that's not the point. The point is the awesome dialogue. It is a lot like Pulp Fiction that way, because the dialogue carries the movie, and there are times when it's wicked funny but other times when it's wicked dramatic. The entire time it's entertaining though. If you like good dialogue/if you like Pulp Fiction, you will love this, is what I'm saying. It does, however, out do Pulp Fiction in terms of the sheer number of f-bombs dropped per minute. Didn't think that was possible either.
It was directed by Martin Scorsese, and I shouldn't need to explain that, but I will: he REALLY out did himself with this movie. It's that awesome. Almost everything about the direction is perfect, especially the way the scenes flow into each other. This may not make sense, or may be you didn't notice it when you saw it, but when I watched it, the scenes and the shots flowed together so well it was like the movie was moving at a million miles per hour. Which is good, because it's two and a half hours long. Part of it is the script is that good, part of it is the shots are so long, and part of is I don't know. But it really enhances the movie.
The bottom line is that The Departed is an awesome movie that you should all see if you haven't already.
In the end, I saw The Departed and there was much rejoicing.
Friday, February 8, 2013
Community: History 101 Review
Okay, I only got into Community recently on the advice of a friend, watched all three seasons in one weekend, fell in love with it, and then found out about all the behind the scenes drama that's happened. And even though I don't usually review comedy, this was way big a deal for me not to.
Spoilers follow.
Okay, so the episode started off and I was genuinely concerned due the whole sans Dan Harmon thing, and when it started off like a cheesy, multi-cam sitcom with a laugh track, I was really worried. But then it was okay because Pierce was the guy from Anchorman, and because it was all just part of Abed's happy place, where the study group is going to be in Greendale forever. And then I laughed.
It was basically the new showrunners' way of saying "we know you guys are worried, but don't fret, this is still Community, not Two and a Half Men." That and I really appreciated the whole bit of Pierce being played by someone else, what with Chevy Chase leaving the show and all. I personally think they revisited it a few too many times (did they really need to use it for the ending gag?), but I still laughed the first time.
Anyway, this season picks up at the start of the study group's last year at Greendale (a good way to acknowledge that this season is probably it), Jeff is only one history credit away from graduating, and he wants the whole group to take History of Ice Cream with him. Cut to the Dean- whose entire office is now Dalmatian- hosting a Hunger Games spoof for spots in the class, where "New" Jeff is competing to win spots for the whole group. Abed looks on in terror whilst Pierce tries to come up with the perfect ball gag. Jeff's competing, especially against Leonard and Annie Kim, was funny, as well as the Dean's cross dressing antics. Say what you will about the character having lost all subtlety, which he has, it was still funny, as was his reaction to his stapler being moved and Jeff's to the Dean moving in next door to him. I'm genuinely shocked he didn't give a big no.
Abed's coping mechanism, which, like I said up top, got old after a few visits, was revived by something very strange indeed: imaginary Abed going to his happy place, a cartoon world where they're all babies a la Baby Looney Tunes. I laughed. Hard. Right up until the point where cartoon baby Jeff begins giving one of his Jeff speeches that addressed both Abed's fears and the fandom's, continued by fake Jeff in multi-cam world, reassuring Abed. (Abed: Nice speech Jeff. Jeff: What speech, I just walked over here? Abed: You gave it in my head. Nice job).
As far as Troy and Britta and their relationship, if you can call it that much, went, I was entertained. The scenes at the fountain, and Donald Glover's delivery in general, were priceless. Heck, I'm genuinely curious to see where it goes.
The only real let down this episode was Annie and Shirley's prank on the Dean, which felt tacked on and undercooked. Plus, it appears Annie may've taken a step back in terms of development. Not good.
And lastly, I was very happy about Chang's cameo at the end (why does he think his name's Kevin?! And Changnesia?!).
All in all, this was a welcomed return to Greendale. Best season opener ever? No. Best episode ever? No. Funny and entertaining? For the most part, yes, and it's still to early to say that the show's best days are behind it.
Final Rating: 83%
Spoilers follow.
Okay, so the episode started off and I was genuinely concerned due the whole sans Dan Harmon thing, and when it started off like a cheesy, multi-cam sitcom with a laugh track, I was really worried. But then it was okay because Pierce was the guy from Anchorman, and because it was all just part of Abed's happy place, where the study group is going to be in Greendale forever. And then I laughed.
It was basically the new showrunners' way of saying "we know you guys are worried, but don't fret, this is still Community, not Two and a Half Men." That and I really appreciated the whole bit of Pierce being played by someone else, what with Chevy Chase leaving the show and all. I personally think they revisited it a few too many times (did they really need to use it for the ending gag?), but I still laughed the first time.
Anyway, this season picks up at the start of the study group's last year at Greendale (a good way to acknowledge that this season is probably it), Jeff is only one history credit away from graduating, and he wants the whole group to take History of Ice Cream with him. Cut to the Dean- whose entire office is now Dalmatian- hosting a Hunger Games spoof for spots in the class, where "New" Jeff is competing to win spots for the whole group. Abed looks on in terror whilst Pierce tries to come up with the perfect ball gag. Jeff's competing, especially against Leonard and Annie Kim, was funny, as well as the Dean's cross dressing antics. Say what you will about the character having lost all subtlety, which he has, it was still funny, as was his reaction to his stapler being moved and Jeff's to the Dean moving in next door to him. I'm genuinely shocked he didn't give a big no.
Abed's coping mechanism, which, like I said up top, got old after a few visits, was revived by something very strange indeed: imaginary Abed going to his happy place, a cartoon world where they're all babies a la Baby Looney Tunes. I laughed. Hard. Right up until the point where cartoon baby Jeff begins giving one of his Jeff speeches that addressed both Abed's fears and the fandom's, continued by fake Jeff in multi-cam world, reassuring Abed. (Abed: Nice speech Jeff. Jeff: What speech, I just walked over here? Abed: You gave it in my head. Nice job).
As far as Troy and Britta and their relationship, if you can call it that much, went, I was entertained. The scenes at the fountain, and Donald Glover's delivery in general, were priceless. Heck, I'm genuinely curious to see where it goes.
The only real let down this episode was Annie and Shirley's prank on the Dean, which felt tacked on and undercooked. Plus, it appears Annie may've taken a step back in terms of development. Not good.
And lastly, I was very happy about Chang's cameo at the end (why does he think his name's Kevin?! And Changnesia?!).
All in all, this was a welcomed return to Greendale. Best season opener ever? No. Best episode ever? No. Funny and entertaining? For the most part, yes, and it's still to early to say that the show's best days are behind it.
Final Rating: 83%
Friday, February 1, 2013
The Following: Chapter Two Review
Alright, so I did a quick review of the pilot episode for this show, I didn't really feel the need for a full review, but now I'm here and I'm gonna do a full on review. Let's do this!
Spoilers follow (no pun intended)
Okay, so the Following came back this week with it's second episode. Episode 2 is usually where I step back and lower my expectations a bit; I don't why, but for me, episode 2 of new show's have, historically, been kinda... bad. And fortunately we were given an exception this week.
Just gonna start off by saying that they averted the "follower of the week" format, at least for this one, and I'm really glad they did. I was afraid it was gonna turn into another generic murder of the week cop show, only with FBI agents and HBO level violence (and I'm genuinely amazed that they've been able to get away with a TV-14 rating).
Anyway, so follower/lacky Jordy commits his first act this week, but that's not the point. It's more like a subplot that becomes relevant towards the end. The real point is the kidnapping of Carol's son Joey by the Follower 3 and Hardy and Co.'s investigation of it. They brought in this new girl in the investigation, replacing the one from last week, which is good because she's a lot more interesting. I'm not really sure what to make of her; at first she came off as this uptight FBI lady who didn't look like she wanted to be there or even address how serious the situation was, but then she goes all psycho-analysis on Carol at Emma's house and dissects him down to tee. She says that she specialized in cults, but she seems almost... euphoric about the whole thing. And she gives Carol that book at the end, further begging the incredibly obvious question that I won't even bother to state. I mean she could just be really into her work and is employing some alternative interrogation techniques... or she could a serial killer. It's a Cylon hunt!
And now for the other main point of the episode: fleshing out the supporting characters, AKA, the Follower 3. I'm just happy that the writers are going the extra mile to make the supporting cast relevant and interesting in general, but the story lines for the 3 was, at least in my opinion, the highlight of the episode. Emma's back story was not only interesting-yet-disturbing (that appears to be the show's MO, and I love it), but reinforces and explores the idea of who Carol's followers are: lonely, damaged people with some issues who get won over by this charismatic man who puts meaning into their lives. Emma and Jacob's little relationship hit all the right marks, and I really liked how it's basically making the third guy who's name escapes me (well aware of how unprofessional that is, you don't need to remind me) start to loose it. I use the term loose it loosely here, obviously, because these people are all quite thoroughly out of their minds; it's more like whatever illusions of mental structure he had are breaking down.
I'm glad they didn't give the kid too much screen time either. I get that he's important, even if I don't know what for, and I liked that Hardy actually said what I thought after watching the pilot: to them, Joey must be some sort Messianic son-of-God type figure, but still, I'm glad he wasn't being shoe-horned into every scene.
And last but not least is Hardy. I like his character so far, even though I feel like I'd care about him less then I would if he wasn't played by Kevin Bacon. And his shooting Jordy at the end of the episode was cool and it shows that he's making progress. But the best part of the episodes ending came with the needed sit-down with Carol. I loved how at first Carol thought everything/his novel is proceeding according to plan, you with that evil smirk on his face, and then that just got crushed when Hardy told him Jordy's still alive. The look on Carol's face when that happened... I can't even describe it; It's like Hardy just slapped him in the face is the best I can do. Makes you wonder just how much control he has, especially when maintaining the appearance of being in control is a huge part of his schtick.
A few side notes: mixed in with all this good were some annoyingly melodramatic moments, unnecessary screen time for Carol's wife who really only seems to be there to be in danger and cry, and a couple cheap scares. Also, if the episode's ending is anything to go by, looks like the man in the mask is getting the spotlight next week. Also also, I very much appreciated the playing of Massive Attack's Angel in the closing scenes (or at least what sounded like a cover of it).
Final Rating: 84%
Spoilers follow (no pun intended)
Okay, so the Following came back this week with it's second episode. Episode 2 is usually where I step back and lower my expectations a bit; I don't why, but for me, episode 2 of new show's have, historically, been kinda... bad. And fortunately we were given an exception this week.
Just gonna start off by saying that they averted the "follower of the week" format, at least for this one, and I'm really glad they did. I was afraid it was gonna turn into another generic murder of the week cop show, only with FBI agents and HBO level violence (and I'm genuinely amazed that they've been able to get away with a TV-14 rating).
Anyway, so follower/lacky Jordy commits his first act this week, but that's not the point. It's more like a subplot that becomes relevant towards the end. The real point is the kidnapping of Carol's son Joey by the Follower 3 and Hardy and Co.'s investigation of it. They brought in this new girl in the investigation, replacing the one from last week, which is good because she's a lot more interesting. I'm not really sure what to make of her; at first she came off as this uptight FBI lady who didn't look like she wanted to be there or even address how serious the situation was, but then she goes all psycho-analysis on Carol at Emma's house and dissects him down to tee. She says that she specialized in cults, but she seems almost... euphoric about the whole thing. And she gives Carol that book at the end, further begging the incredibly obvious question that I won't even bother to state. I mean she could just be really into her work and is employing some alternative interrogation techniques... or she could a serial killer. It's a Cylon hunt!
And now for the other main point of the episode: fleshing out the supporting characters, AKA, the Follower 3. I'm just happy that the writers are going the extra mile to make the supporting cast relevant and interesting in general, but the story lines for the 3 was, at least in my opinion, the highlight of the episode. Emma's back story was not only interesting-yet-disturbing (that appears to be the show's MO, and I love it), but reinforces and explores the idea of who Carol's followers are: lonely, damaged people with some issues who get won over by this charismatic man who puts meaning into their lives. Emma and Jacob's little relationship hit all the right marks, and I really liked how it's basically making the third guy who's name escapes me (well aware of how unprofessional that is, you don't need to remind me) start to loose it. I use the term loose it loosely here, obviously, because these people are all quite thoroughly out of their minds; it's more like whatever illusions of mental structure he had are breaking down.
I'm glad they didn't give the kid too much screen time either. I get that he's important, even if I don't know what for, and I liked that Hardy actually said what I thought after watching the pilot: to them, Joey must be some sort Messianic son-of-God type figure, but still, I'm glad he wasn't being shoe-horned into every scene.
And last but not least is Hardy. I like his character so far, even though I feel like I'd care about him less then I would if he wasn't played by Kevin Bacon. And his shooting Jordy at the end of the episode was cool and it shows that he's making progress. But the best part of the episodes ending came with the needed sit-down with Carol. I loved how at first Carol thought everything/his novel is proceeding according to plan, you with that evil smirk on his face, and then that just got crushed when Hardy told him Jordy's still alive. The look on Carol's face when that happened... I can't even describe it; It's like Hardy just slapped him in the face is the best I can do. Makes you wonder just how much control he has, especially when maintaining the appearance of being in control is a huge part of his schtick.
A few side notes: mixed in with all this good were some annoyingly melodramatic moments, unnecessary screen time for Carol's wife who really only seems to be there to be in danger and cry, and a couple cheap scares. Also, if the episode's ending is anything to go by, looks like the man in the mask is getting the spotlight next week. Also also, I very much appreciated the playing of Massive Attack's Angel in the closing scenes (or at least what sounded like a cover of it).
Final Rating: 84%
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