The Top 5 Movie Monsters

So, I've watched Cloverfield, which features a giant monster of unknown origins terrorizing a major city. So, because of that I've decided to to compile my 5 favorite monsters that go around killing folk in film. Allons-y!

5. Shelob The Giant Spider (Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King)
I know this was a minor part of the 210 minutes of awesome of Return of the King (240 if you watched the extended version) and that it really didn't do all that much save for try to kill Frodo and get powned by a suddenly badass Sam, but it was kind of awesome. Maybe I'm just a sucker for giant spiders on account of I used to be terrified of them.

4. The Raptors (Jurrassic Park )

Do these really count because they're dinos? Yes, yes they do. Why? Because they're carnivorous, super intelligent dinos that terrorize the island, killing everyone they see, they hunt in packs, and they can open doors. They can open doors for God's sake! This was proof that not all movie monsters have to be really stupid, and that if you have to choose between meeting a raptor and Chuck Norris in dark alley, pick Norris! He might kill you painlessly.

3. The Cloverfield Monster (Cloverfield)

Did I just write this list to rave about this movie even more? Maybe, but it's my list. I basically have this here instead of Godzilla because it's much cooler! First off, it destroys everything in sight, such as buildings, the Statue of Liberty, and the Brooklyn Bridge. Second, it lauches smaller monsters off of it's back that look like big spider (yay) that can tear you to pieces and if they bite you, your head explodes. Third, the army hits it with bullets, missiles, and bombs and it still survives. They eventually drop an atomic bomb on it, and it's not even clarified if it worked! Plus, you never find out just what it is or where it's from, and you only see it's face like twice, and that makes it pretty darn creepy.

2. Bruce the Great White Shark (Jaws)

This kinda had to be here. Steven Spielberg's megahit about a great white that terrorizes an island community still strikes fear in the hearts of people today. So Bruce is just a gigantic great white shark goes around eating swimmers, sailors, and dogs, pulling docks off their hinges, and tearing boats to shreds. The body count quickly rises, and the film used all the fake blood supplies in America for that year. Even though he was killed by an explosion at the end of the movie, Bruce is still the main reason by fear of oceans, which lands him a spot on the list. I wanted to put Bruce at #1, but I couldn't because all of the movie's carnage could've been avoided had everyone simply stayed out of the water...

And the number 1 movie monster of all time is....

1. The Alien (Alien franchise)

Now, I haven't really made it a secret that love Alien, so maybe I'm a little biased in this decision. But I don't care! So why is the titular alien so awesome? Here's why: it's born inside of you body, and when it's ready to enter the world, it tears through your chest and kills you. And then it goes through some major puberty, growing about 6 times it size in about an hour. From there, if there's only one, it will most likely stalk you and your crew, killing you off one at a time, taking full advantage of the fact that the only way to kill is by shooting it out into space. If it finds you, it'll rip you apart limb by limb. And guess what? It has an evil robot manservant helping it! If there's more than one, it'll full on attack you and destroy you and everyone with you. And it's got an evil queen with a mouth inside of her mouth that will hunt you down and butcher you for dinner! And even when you team up with Predators to kill it, the alien will still kick your ass! And that makes the Alien the number one movie monster of all time.

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Movie Reviewed: Cloverfield

With the sole exception Alcatraz, I have yet to be disappointed by JJ Abrams. So, I just watched Abrams's 2008, somewhat low-budget horror/action flick Cloverfield, and that means it's time to inflict my opinions about it on the internet.

In A Nutshell: Cloverfield follows a group of New Yorkers who must flee for their lives after a giant, Godzilla-esque monster of unknown origins begins terrorizing and destroying Manhattan and and struggle to survive as the military launches a full on war against it. Oh, and it's recovered footage. Now, my opinions on that sub-genre vary (Apollo 18 almost ruined it for me, Chronicle sort salvaged it) but it was done pretty well, and I think it wouldn't have been as good in 3rd person.

The Good: The overall story was really good. They take the time to make you actually care about the characters before people start dying. Most of the plot is generated by the monster wreaking havoc and destruction, and damn entertaining havoc and destruction it was. I mean who didn't love seeing the Statue of Liberty getting decapitated? It was full of suspense, too, which, coupled with all the chaos, made it genuinely freaky. All the actors did a good job with what they were given, and the characters were pretty believable, and, unlike a lot of horror movies, someone bothers to crack a joke every once and awhile. I was also happy they never actually explain what the monster is or where it came from, instead just naming of a bunch of possible origins. Plus, you never see the entire monster at once, and you only see the monster's face twice, and one of the times it was only for about three seconds, which makes it pretty eerie. And the ending, while predictable, was more than a little bit chilling.

The Bad: Now, this is my beef with most recovered footage movies: there were some moments where it just didn't make sense that the guy kept holding the camera. I mean, when your running from a giant monster and the lethal mini-monsters that jump off of it's back while the military fires missiles at it, most people wouldn't still be holding a camera, they'd drop it and run for there life. Now, it's easy enough to get past that, and if you can (I did) then then you should enjoy the movie. It's also a kinda low-budget, but that's to be expected from recovered footage. The only other thing is the length. The movie is 84 minutes long. If you paid to see this movie (I didn't) then you might feel a bit ripped off, just because you spent money to basically watch something that wasn't even an hour and half. Once again, it's not hard to get past that, and if you can, then the movie's easy to enjoy.

Am I on board with this? Yes. Is it the best thing JJ Abrams has ever done? No, but it's not the worst thing he's done either (cough cough, Alcatraz.) Is it my favorite horror movie? No, that's still either Donnie Darko or Alien. But is it good and entertaining as horror movies go? Absolutely.

Final Rating: 87%


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Episode Reviewed: Grimm: Leave it to the Beavers

So apparently, trolls do in fact think they own all bridges, much to the dismay beaver-vessin, who have their own little mini-society that meet at "lodges." That's where the mythos go this episode, and little more.

In A Nutshell: So after seeing a troll-vessin commit a murder, a beaver vessin hides out with the previously introduced beavers. Nick needs this guy to pin the murderer, but, since beavers are cowards and they've had a feud going with trolls for quite some time, he won't, mainly out of fear of the retaliation the trolls will take. Nick then has to try to convince the beaver to come out of hiding and not only do what's right, but stick up for himself and his kind. But there's a catch; the troll realizes there's a Grimm trying to put him away for murder, so he calls on The Reapers to take out Nick. And somewhere in this Monroe comes over to Nick and Juliette's for dinner.

The Good: Overall, this was an entertaining procedural episode. We also get some mythology here too, mostly with the Reapers, but a little bit too with the characterization of trolls as controlling jerks and beavers as cowards. The dinner scene between Nick, Juliette, and Monroe is rather hilariously awakward, mostly because Nick and Monroe don't know what to tell Juliette (it's not like they can say Monroe is monster who helps Nick hunt monsters) and that basically provides the episodes comic relief. For me, the real highpoint of the episode was the fight scene towards the end between Nick and the two Reapers. It was pretty darn epic and it's safe to say at this point Nick has become a total badass. The end result, Nick has to send the Reaper's employer a "message" shall we say. Heh heh heh.

The Bad: This was mostly a monster of the week story, which can be a little frustrating this late season. I also found it hard to believe that Renard didn't notice at all that there were two Reapers in his city, especially when the last time that happened, he tracked the Reaper down and cut off his ear.

Final Rating: 89%

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The Top 10 Whedonverse Episodes

Let me just say this: THIS WAS DIFFICULT TO WRITE! Now, with Joss Whedon's the Avengers coming out next week, I've decided to count down my top ten favorite episodes of all four of his shows. You'd think I'd be doing the top ten superhero movies right now, but I've decided to save that for after I review the Avengers. Once again, with 294 total episodes to choose from, this was hard to write, but being the Whedon freak that I am, I managed to pull this off. A little warning, there will be spoilers. So let's get started. The top ten Whedonverse episodes:

10. Safe (Firefly)
Now I loved just about every episode of Firefly, but this one really stood out to me. On the way to sell some cattle in a backwater town on a backwater planet, Simon and River get kidnapped by some hillfolk (they need a doctor for their town) We start to see River's telepathic abilities, and this leads the town to think she's a witch. Through flashbacks, we see how Simon clashed with his parents as he decided to break River out of the Alliance facility. Summer Glau and Sean Maher both do awesome jobs here, and while there might not have been as much action as in other episodes, if you didn't love the Big Damn Heroes bit at the end, you cannot call yourself a Whedon fan.

9. 5 By 5/ Sanctuary (Angel)
I might get some crap for grouping these together, but in my mind this was a two part episode. So, Faith arrives in LA, and Wolfram and Hart hires her out to kill Angel. We get some mind games and life-attempts, and after Faith nearly tortures Wesley to death, Angel rushes in, and Faith's criminal insanity catches up to her as she completely breaks down. After that, Angel starts trying to rehabilitate Faith, and things get shaken up when Buffy AND the Watchers Council show up, and they both want blood. There is no weak performance here, and the emotion generated by both slayers and of course the fight with the Watchers make this episode plenty of fun, and, in my opinion, the highlight of the whole first season.

8. Objects In Space (Firefly)
The 1st season and, sadly, series finale of Firefly saw the crew finally become fully aware of River's telepathic abilities, just as a bounty hunter with... interesting views on right on wrong gets on board Serenity one night to take River. As he uses Simon to find her on the ship, things take an interesting turn. This was another episode where River pretty much steals the show, proving that Summer Glau is pretty amazing actress on top of being super hot. Honestly, just about everything going on in this episode was awesomely entertaining.

7. Redefinition (Angel)
This is another episode that I don't understand why more people love. So, in the last episode, Druscilla shows up, re-vamps Darla, and a broken Angel ends up letting them, helping them, even, feast on the Wolfram and Hart Junior Partners. He then proceeds to fire Wesley, Gunn, and Cordy and goes all dark, because, you know, he does that sometimes. But it's much better this time. He then undergoes intense physical and mental training to reinvent himself as a cold-hearted weapon of mass destruction, leading to some of the greatest badassery in the history television. Meanwhile, Cordy, Gunn, and Wes have to figure out what to do with their lives, and they do this by getting drunk and singing karaoke at Caritas. Seriously, epic, badass action and a hysterical subplot; how can you go wrong.

6. The Gift (Buffy)
Buffy's fifth season was easily it's most serialized, and it all lead up to this: the amazing, action-packed, and very emotional season finale. So, Glory, our favorite hell god, has Dawn, and is going to use her to tear the dimensional walls down and go home, which would cause hell descend upon the earth. If Glory succeeds, the only way to reverse it is to kill Dawn. Buffy lost an awful lot in season 5, so she wasn't about to go kill her own sister. So, using Tara, Buffy, Spike, and the Scoobies go to Glory's base of ops for one final showdown to either save the world or watch it burn. The fight scene between Buffy and Glory alone was incredible, plus the all the emotion leading up to it really sealed the deal. Everyone has something to do here, too, which only makes things better. And if you didn't feel something when Buffy gave her speech to Dawn as she sacrifices herself, you have no soul.

5. The Body (Buffy)
Buffy's mom has anyeursm and dies, and leaving Buffy and the scoobies to react and deal. That's it. Nothing supernatural, save for one vampire who meets the buissness part of saw. On paper, that probably doesn't sound very good, but believe, it was. Was it depressing? Yes, but the fact that a fantasy show gave the most realistic, well written, and perfectly acted responses to the natural death of a loved one ever produced has a poetic irony to it that makes it impossible not love. Seriously, this was so good that the fact that this isn't number one on the list means some damn good stuff is ahead.

4. Out of Gas (Firefly)
Serenity's engine breaks down and the life support system begins failing as the crew find themselves nowhere anyone is likely to find them. As Mal struggles to hold the ship and the crew together, we see, through flashbacks, how Zoe, Wash, Jayne, Kaylee, and Inara ended up on the Serenity, and how Mal ended up with the ship to begin with. All the actors here are at their finest, especially Nathan Fillion, in what is the best episode of the entire show. It's one of those things that's hard to explain why it's awesome, but once you've seen it, you know why.

3. Epitaph One (Dollhouse)
So after Dollhouse gave us formulaic, somewhat tedious first season, we find ourselves in the post-apocalyptic future of 2019, where anyone can become a doll after coming in contact with almost any kind of technology. So, some people end up shells with there entire personality and most of there brains wiped, some people have copies of there memories placed into other people's bodies, and some find themselves programmed to kill anyone who's not programmed to kill anyone after nothing more then a phone call. A group of survivors end up inside the LA dollhouse and learn through the programming chair how this all happened (the dollhouse technology ends up with the wrong people and spirals out of control as Echo, Paul, and others work to undo it) which we see through flashbacks. It just kicked some serious ass, but, oh wait, it never got aired because FOX is evil.

2. A Hole in the World (Angel)
Winifred "Fred" Burkle, our beloved super genious Texan and Wesley's new girlfriend, is dying. How? She's been exposed to the air inside the coffin of the ancient parasitic demon Illyria, who is now hollowing out Fred's body, turning it into a shell. Angel and Spike haul ass to England to find a cure as Gunn tries to work out how this happended and Wesley comforts the dying remains of the woman he loves. This one just covered all the bases: action, comedy relief, and LOTS of emotion. Take that and add in the slighly haunting final scene and there you have it.

1. Restless (Buffy)
The fourth season finale saw Buffy, Willow, Xander, and Giles recovering from their near-death fight with Adam. To do so, they stay up all night watching movies, and soon, they all fall asleep. From there, the rest of the episode takes place in dream sequences that sum up all of the emotional changes undergone by each character this season, and something unearthly is stalking them in their dreams. The dreams themselves are among the most bizarre-but-incredibly-awesome-in-a-poetic-sort-of-way things I have ever seen in my entire life and just felt so... great, I guess is the word. Take that and of course the legendary Cheese Man and you've got the single finest hour of television ever written.

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Season Reviewed: The Walking Dead Season 2

If you ask me what my favorite show on right now is, my answer will be "probably either Sherlock or the Walking Dead." Why? Because the Walking Dead rules. TWD is AMC's hit serial drama, set in a zombie apocalypse. The show follows a group of survivors as they struggle to avoid death. At the same time, the show examines what it means to be human when human society has pretty much come to end. Let's break down season 2, shall we.

In A Nutshell: After the first season's finale, the surviving survivors flee from Atlanta and end up. They end up in a traffic jam of all things, and a herd of walkers pass by, forcing them to hide under cars. Sophia accidently ends up in the woods next to the highway, being chased by 2 walkers. Rick goes after her and tells her to hide while he takes out the walkers. When he gets back, Sophia's gone. On the quest to find her, Carl gets shot by a hunter, Otis. Otis leads them to a safe haven farm, run by Hershel. Hershel operates on Carl after Shane goes through hell to get supplies. The rest of the group stays there while they continue to look for Sophia. Secrets among everyone threaten to tear everything apart. The season focuses largely on character developement, and just about everyone changes somehow. Just about every episode ends with some sort of cliffhanger, and the storytelling is heavily serialized (yay.)

The Good: The show still gives us solid action scenes along with great character developement, which is emphasised more this season. The character developement  gives the show more dramatic depth and we get more attached to these people. We still get some good "Holy Crap" cliffhanger endings, too. Overall I was pleased with the storytelling and I think plenty of stuff goes down.

The Bad: Season 1 was six episodes and season 2 was 13. This leads to the pace being slowed a little bit. Is there less action? Sadly, yes. It didn't really feel stretched out, but more drama and less action can make the show feel a bit soap opera-y at times.

Noteworthy Episodes:

Now, this is usually where I give my favorite episodes of the season, but TWD is such a serialized show that individual episodes don't really stand out to me personally so much as they all just mesh together. I will say this though:
The season premier was awesome, and the season finale kicked all manners of ass, both being action-packed and intense.
There were also some episodes midseason that really did it for me, too, most notably ones early in the season and leading up to the finale.

So, once again, I thought overall it was a great season, not a step up from season 1, but not a step down either. If you're fine with the show being slower from time to time, then the season won't be lost on you.

Final Rating: 90%

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Rant: Spinoffs

So, sometimes, you'll have a good show. Sometimes, the show will be so popular that the showrunner decides to have one character leave and have his/her own show, or take a theme from the show and reapply it somewhere. Sometimes this works. Most of the time it doesn't. These are called Spinoff series.

I'm not opposed to the existence of spinoffs, I just think they're tough to pull off, mostly because a lot of them just feel like rehashes of the parent show in a different setting with some not (or not so new) characters. If the writers can make it different and, obviously, make it good, then I'm down. But a lot of the time that's too much to ask.

Examples of Good Spinoffs:

Torchwood: Doctor Who, as it turns out, is the most spun off show in existence. This is just the one I'm most familiar with. So, Captain Jack Harkness, the immortal time traveling con man first intoruduced in season 1 of NuWho, ends up as leader of the Cardiff chapter of the Torchwood Institute, and organization introduced in NuWho season 2. This honestly got off to a really rocky start, with most season 1 pretty much sucking and failing to overcome early dismissal as "Doctor Who for grownups" with stories that just seemed like stuff they couldn't do on Doctor Who. Season 2 show up though and pretty much saved things, carving out a nice little niche for Torchwood to inhabit after amping up the pace, character developement, and frankly the writing quality. Season 3 was a five epispode mini series and was absolute masterpiece, and was the only time I have like Torchwood better than it's parent. Season 4 sucked. But overall, Torchwood is good.

Angel: One of the better spinoff series is Angel. So the vampire with a soul leaves the love of his life/undeath for her own good and heads up to LA. Naturally, he starts fighting vampires and demons because it makes him feel good about himself, which is something you need when your a demon constantly tortured by a soul your not meant to have. He runs into Cordelia of all people, and Irish half-demon Doyle, and they form Angel Investigations, a detective agency/ demon fighting force. Once again, it got off to a bit of a rough start in season 1, a lot of which I would describe as OK with a side of greatness, but it soon found it's niche as a fantasy-film noire type deal, becoming darker, grittier, and more philosophical than it's parent. Was it ever better then it's parent? Overall, probably not, but I try to avoid comparing the two because they became pretty different. But believe me when I say that it was kicked some pretty serious ass.

Examples of Bad Spinoffs:

The Cleveland Show: I don't like Family Guy very much either, but this is somewhat painfully bad.

That 80's Show: Do I even need to explain this one?

Caprica: Maybe this is just lost on me because I've never seen the parent (BSG) but this has got to be one of the most melodramatic, predictable, and poorly conceived.

So, that's my rant on spinoffs. Be sure to comment, subscribe, and check my other posts.

Teenage Mutant Ninga Turtles

I seriously doubt any of you who are reading this hasn't heard about this a million times by now, but, because I'm me, I now obliged to blog about it. So Michael Bay, best known for directing Pearl Harbor and the Transformers movies, has decided to remake/reboot the TMNT franchise, and he's making a few changes. For one thing, they're not mutants any more, they're aliens. Are you kidding me Bay, your messing with the title here! And Donatello is going to be a girl (I'm not offended by that because I'm not sexist cretin, but I'm sure someone somewhere, most likely a 40 year old Brony in his mother's basement, weeped upon hearing this). Granted, I never actually watched TMNT when I was small(er), so it's really just the part of me that hates Michael Bay that's PO'ed about this movie. What can I say beyond I don't like him. He takes beloved childhood cartoons and craps all over them. Just look what he did to Transformers! Okay, I didn't watch that as a kid either, but those were three horrendously bad films and five hours of my life I'll never get back. He really represents what is wrong with movies today: a plotless, 90 minute combo of explosions and fart jokes. I'm unclear on why studios keep greenlighting his pitches. I'm just going to establish this now: should this movie actually get made (there's always the possibility it could toil in development hell for eternity ala Jurassic Park 4) then nothing short of being paid some absurd amount of money will make me see it.

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Movie Reviewed: The Muppets

It's no secret that April is the worst month of the year for movies, and, consequently, I haven't done any movie reviews this month. I watched the Muppets recently, so I decided to review it.

In A Nutshell: The plot basically centers around Walter, a muppet raised by humans whose a huge fan of the Muppets Show. He joins forces with a teacher from his town and her boyfriend to reunite the Muppets for another show. They track down Kermit, and from there the rest of the gang assembles. And there's Jack Black. There's only one problem: they gotta put on a show and prove that they deserve to be on air. And, naturally, there's an evil buissness conglomerate out to stop them for some reason.

The Good: I was actually pretty reluctant to watch this at first, but I'm very glad I did, because it was hysterical. It was definetly refreshing to watch a comedy movie that doesn't derive jokes from being dirty or cynical. I don't really know how to describe it other than it did what is seemingly impossible these days: be hilarious in a way that can appeal to just about anyone of any age AND be cute and sentimental, and yet also satirical and clever, at the same time. What other movie can pull that off?

THE Bad: I got nothing.

FAVORITE SCENE: It's a tough call, but I'm gonna go with a tie between the Oscar winning musical number "Man or a Muppet" and the scene in which the muppets kidnap Jack Black and shrink his head while they perform a barbershop quartet version of "Smells Like Teen Spirit."

Final Rating: 93%

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Season Reviewed: Smallville Season 2

I've just finished season 2, so it's review time. So, Smallville follows Clark Kent in the years before he became Superman as his powers develope while he grows up in Smallville, Kansas. This is one of those shows that I feel like is an example of either the switch is on or off. It's good or bad. Fortunately, the good moments tend to outway the bad moments.
The show had some casting changes in that John Glover joined the cast a Lex Luther's father Lionel, and Eric Johnson's Whitney Fordman left the show after the season 1 finale. Whitney did return for one episode and was promptly [SPOILERS!] This was definetly a step up over season 1, with the show, for the most part, getting past the kryptonite-induced "Freak of the Week" format. We had a story arc invovling some native american caves that tell the story of a man who fell from the sky durring a meteor shower, is invulnerable, and has super strength and heat vision. Sound familiar. And to top it all off, the writing on the walls is Kryptonian, and there's a space on one of the walls that fits the key to the space ship. Clark, Lex, and Lionel are all very interested by this.

At the same time, we have relationship drama. Now, this in itself isn't a bad thing, but at times it can feel a bit soap opera, though, to be fair, there are sci fi shows that would just be soap operas without whatever their concept is (the Walking Dead, for example.) My biggest beef with the relationship drama is that the thing that creates most of it (Chloe's actions in the premiere), for me, at least, felt contrived.

I liked the overall story going here, and there were a good amount of standalones that I enjoyed, but some of them felt a bit bland. The special effects got amped up and we got a few darn good actions scenes, too. Tom Welling, Kristin Kreuk, Michael Rosenbaum, Annete O'Toole, and John Schneider all do phenomal jobs in there respective roles, which had some solid character developement.

Noteworthy Episodes:

Vortex: The season premiere gave us some closure to season 1's cliffhanger, with Smallville recovering from the devastating tornados. This leads to some major character changes, with Clark's secret nearly being exposed, Lionel being blinded, and Lex having a body on his hands.

Heat: Clark's heat vision developes. That's it really. The episode itself was just another freak of the week deal.

Duplicity: In which Pete finds out Clark's secret after finding the spaceship in a cornfield.

Red: Two words: Red Kryptonite. A few more words: Clark finds some, and it turns him into an angsty rebel.

Skinwalker: The cave story arc is introduced.

Rush: Something at the caves is making Pete and Chloe act like adrenaline-crazed nutjobs. And to make matters worse, Clark's on some red kryptonite at the same time.

Rosetta: My favorite episode of season 2. Clark keeps dreaming about the caves, specifically flying there at night and putting the key in it's slot. After the dreams, he wakes up on the side of a road. Clark finally puts the key in, and it basically downloads the Kryptonian language onto his brain. From there, he's contacted by Dr. Virgil Swann (PLAYED BY CHRISTOPHER REEVE OH MY GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!) who tells him of Krypton, ie, that it was destroyed, he's parents sent him to earth, and his real name is Kal-El.

Visitor: Another student in Smallville claims to be an alien, and proves it with heat vision and healing powers. Clark thinks that the kid might be a Kryptonian. Very compelling and dramatic.

Calling/ Exodus: The two part season finale, in which Lex gets married (again) Clark has massive fights with both Chloe and a super-powered doctor, and Jor-El's consciousness contacts Clark from the spaceship, telling him he must leave Smallville or everyone he loves will be hurt. Cliffhanger ending again.

So, that's my spiel. Once again, good arc, some bland standalones, step up from season 1. There were some faults, but it was worth it to see the passing of the torch between Christopher Reeve and Tom Welling.

Final Rating: 85%

Season Reviewed: Supernatural season 2

Okay, I know I am five years late with this review, but to be fair, I was ten when this season was actually on. I have got into this show relatively recently after my friend loaned me his box set for the first season. I plowed through it, and he loaned me the DVDs for season 2 as well. I loved and I decided to do a review. So Superantural season 2 aired from 2006-2007 on the CW and was comprised of 22 episodes. So, Sam and Dean Winchester are two brothers who hunt demons, spirits, and spooks. Why? A demon murdered there mother when they were kids, so there dad became a revenge-obsessed spook-hunter. Season 1 ended with Sam, Dean, and there dad, John, coming close to finally killing the yellow-eyed demon who murdered Mary Winchester and Jessica, Sam's girlfriend. But, they fail. And the demon posseses a guy who then crashes a truck into their car. Season 2 picks up from that with the Winchesters being brought to a hospital. Dean is dying and on the astral plane. The situation becomes so desperate that John sells his soul to the yellow eyed demon to bring Dean back. With John dead and the demon still at large, the brothers aren't sure what to do or how to deal. So, to keep themselves busy, they keep hunting spooks. This season was largely monster of the week stories, with a story arc involving ol'yellow-eyes, who has plans for special children with physic powers, one of which is Sam, who gets visions of people about to die (if your thinking spoilers right now, you find out about that in season 1.) What are his plans? Yeah, like I'm gonna tell you that. Some episodes contributed directly to this arc, while others were more sublte. They also follow up on Dean's murder charges in season 1 with a few episodes. There's also some emotional drama brought on by Dean dealing with John's death, which mostly involves him adopting a self-destructive personality and throwing himself into hunting. It all leads up the absolutely epic and amazing two-part season finale, titled "All Hell Breaks Loose."  We also get some new characters and old characters:

Bobby, an aging hunter and an old friend of John's. He helps out from time to time.
Ellen, a hunter's widow who runs a road house frequented by hunters.

Jo, Ellen's daughter who wants to be a hunter. She was supposed to be a love interest for Dean, but she came off more like a little sister (Sam even comments on that mid-season.)

Ash, a super genious, great with computers, who got kicked out of MIT. He's hilarious, mostly because he's a computer-whiz but looks like a Lynyrd Skynyrd roadie. He even has a mullet.

Gordon, who I can't really talk about without spoiling things a bit.

Noteworthy episodes:

In My Time of Dying: The season premier picks up where season 1 left off, in the aftermath of the car crash. Very emotional, very well done, and it involves astral projection and a reaper.

Bloodlust: Yay, vampires! I love vampires, this episode had them. And one of them was played by Amber Benson (OH MY GOD IT'S TARA!!!!!)

Simon Said: We meet Andy Gallagher, another one of the special children the demon is interested in. His power: mind control, which basically works like Jedi mind tricks.

Croatoan: In which Supernatural takes a stab at the legend of the lost colony of Roanoke, North Carolina. Genuinely creepy.

Hunted: Sam takes off to find more of the special children after Dean finally gives him John's last message. Don't know what it was, but I really liked this one.

Playthings: Two words: Creepy kids.

Night Shifter: It's complicated, but the brothers brushes with the law are starting to catch up with them. Plus, best ending scene ever. Watch it right now:

Tall Tales/ Hollywood Babylon: These are two seperate standalone stories, but they are something different: these were the episodes the writers played up for laughs because A., they could, and B., the rest of the season was very dark and very heavy. These were effectively the room to breath this season. In Tall Tales, something funny is going down at a college, and in Hollywood Babylon, they mock the crap out of the cliches of today's horror movies.

Roadkill: Not your standard episode, for sure. It's very hard to explain, but I LOVE this episode. You could actyually probably watch this one without having seen the rest of the show, too.

All Hell Breaks Loose: The two part season finale. Phenomonal.

Overall, I loved this season. It had great standalones and amazing story arc, which the writers did a good job of blending. There were some episodes that probably could have been done better, but for the most part this was an awesome season and if you haven't seen it, get off your ass and either torrent some episodes or buy some DVDs.

Final Rating: 96%

Trailer anyone?

Episode Reviewed: Grimm: Cat and Mouse

Mythology comes to mind with this episode for sure. It's been a long time coming, but it's here, at least a little bit. So, we learn this week that Captain Renard and his "Royal Family" are one of seven royal families that have allied themselves with a group of Vessin control freaks who run the world from a far. Some Grimms have also allied themselves with the group. There's a name for the group, but it's, as is to be expected, it's an obscure Europeans term that remember, spell, or pronounce. There is however, a resistance group of Vessin, of which Rosalie's brother was a member. Rosalie's ex, a member of said resistance, shows up in town with a hit man on his trail looking for a new ID. Rosalie and Monroe harbor him, especially after the assassin frames him for murder, putting Nick on his trail. So, Nick, after finding that Monroe and Rosalie are helping the freedom fighter, is torn: be a cop or be a Grimm. The bulk of the episode is a sort of cat and mouse game, kind of like a 40 minute, slightly toned-down spy film, which was very entertaining. I enjoyed this episode for sure, mostly because it was nice to see Grimm get away from it's usual formula and expand it's own little universe a bit, especially with the season finale getting closer. It's also becoming more and more enjoyable to watch the dynamic between Nick, Monroe, and Rosalie (three misfits out to fight evil? Maybe David Greenwalt is injecting Grimm with a little bit Angel.) I also have a new theory: what if the Captain isn't a Vessin, but a Grimm? It's possible. I also have a feeling that, with the show already renewed for a second season, the season finale will end with a cliff-hanger. It would definetly be a good strategy. Final Rating: 89%

I'M BAAAAAAAACCCCCCCKKKKKKKKK

Exactly what is says on the tin. Sorry I've been gone all week, but I was in Florida until yesterday. Hung out at the beach, went fishing, got a tan. But now I'm in MA and it's time to please my two readers.

Message

Okay, guys I'm just letting you know something: I have the week off. You'd think that means "yay, new entries daily! Horray!" Well, no. I'm going on vacation to Florida this week, and I won't be back for a few days, so I'll be largely absent this week.

Rant: Perfect Series

It's no secret that there are a lot of shows that I like, whether they're on today or have already ended. But it is rare when I bump into a show where I've genuinely liked every episode. It's just improbable. The only examples I have of a show where I've that hasn't had, in my opinion, a single bad episode are Firefly and Sherlock. Keep in mind, they only made 14 episodes of Firefly, and Sherlock's only had 6 so far. I could probably say the same for the Walking Dead, but the thing is that TWD is so serialized that for me, it all just meshes together, and I honestly can't name individual episodes that stand out to me. In my mind, season 1 was just a six hour long movie. Season two is basically the same. I don't know, maybe I'm just being difficult, but I guess it doesn't count. Doctor Who, one of my favorite shows ever, has had flops. Every season since 2005 has produced it least one episode I didn't like, with the exception of season 6 (there weren't any I disliked, but I can't that I loved all of them either.) It's probably that the premise is so high-concept that writing something bad is relatively easy. It's weird, I mean I want shows I like to go on for a while, but at the same time when they do that, they run the risk of producing more bad episodes. Or I'm just being totally ridiculous. I know that by now I'm rambling for sure, though I've got a funny feeling I've been doing that the whole time. Whatever.

Episode Reviewed: Grimm: Love Sick

And the plot thickens. This episode gave us answers and questions. Answers: Hexenbeasts are in fact witches of sorts, Wu's coin/couch/paperclip/insert weird object here-eating was a result of taking the love potion meant for Hank and they managed to cure him, Renard's first name is Jean and his family is really pulling the strings, and there's something very interesting that happens to Vessin when they get a dose of Grimm-blood. So, Adalin's love spell begins to take full affect on Hank, making him obsessed, which Nick realizes after he and Juliette have dinner with the witch and her boy. He, Monroe, and the newest piece on the board Rosalie have to take action or Hank is literally going to die for love. Naturally, Adalin and the Captain have been planning for this and we finally find out what it is they hoped to get from nick through Hank: the key Marie gave Nick in the pilot episode. And it does quite a bit more then open doors, something the writers are clearly going to be using further down the road, most likely in the season finale. At the same time, Renard's cousin visits and apparently the royal family back in Europe is growing impatient with his progress, or lack thereof, and things do not end well. Good episode for sure, and I feel like we're seeing more and more of where the show is going and what it's capable of each week, which I'm obviously pleased by. I also think Rosalie was a good addition to the show, and I'm happy with the more frequent use of twist/ambiguous endings. And it was nice to see Wu not be useless. Final Rating: 90%

The Top 5 TV Shows that went on too long

I know I'm not alone among Supernatural fans when I say that with each new episode, the show gets closer to the point where it SHOULD end. But that doesn't mean that's when it will end. The show is still good, but the writers are starting to scrape off the bottom of the barrel for evil to fight, and it would be best if the show ends before it starts to suck. But I doubt that will happen. At the very least, the CW won't let it happen purely because the Brothers Winchester are really all that's standing between them and total bankrupcy. It wouldn't be the first time something like that's happened either; shows go on well past there creative prime far too much. At one point, the show as a pleasure to watch becomes like a chore that we don't have to do, yet we keep doing it anyway (sounds suspicously like Alcatraz.)  It's usually brought on by greedy networks or overzealous fans who refuse to let the show go out on a creative high note. So, I've decided why not count down the 5 shows that best represent that. However, let it be noted that these are all shows that I at one point loved, but reached a point where they became a travesty of their former selves.

5. That 70s Show
Network: FOX
Seasons: 8

For seven solid years, the misadventures of six Wisconsin teenagers growing up in the 1970s was one of the funniest things to ever grace the airwaves. From the Star Wars jokes to the circle scenes to the forshadowing, we couldn't get enough of it.

When it should have ended: Season 7. It's universally agreed by fans the season 7 would have been a much better ending point for the hit sitcom. But FOX ordered an 8th season, and there lies the mistake. Season 8 saw both Topher Grace's Eric Foreman and Ashton Kutcher's Michael Kelso, the funniest characters on the show, leave to pursue movie careers, Fez and Jackie started dating (I'm sorry what?) and we got a new guy named Randy, who was universally hated by fans. To be fair, the finale actually was pretty good, mainly because Eric returned and got back together with Donna (again) and we got one final circle scene, but it alone couldn't make up the atrocious twenty-something proceeding episodes.

4. Leverage
Network: TNT
Seasons: 4 and counting

At one point, TNT's hit crime drama about 5 modern day Robin Hood's was my favorite show on TV. From the plans to the cons to the fights to the jokes to the charactets, I loved it.

When it shoudl have ended: Season 3. The first three seasons gave solid, clever stories, all leading up to the epic climax of season 3. And then season 4, which fans were looking forward to at first, rolled along. Og. The writing quality just went and fell off a cliff. The episodes got increasingly predictable, repititive, and mediocre, tied together by a story arc that was a mere shadow of season 3's. I kept watching out of hope it would improve, but after the one with the potato, I realized it was time to give up.

3. Chuck
Network: NBC
Seasons: 5

NBC went all genre-bender on us with this sci fi-espionage-dramedy. The show followed Charles "Chuck" Irving Bartowski, an electronics store employee who accidently gets a computer full of federal secrets downloaded onto his brain. He teamed up with an NSA assasin and a crazy hot CIA agent to use his knowledge for the good of the country, all the while trying to keep his secret from his sister and best friend.

When it should have ended: Season 3. The first two seasons were like a slightly more dramatic, sci fi version of Get Smart, giving us many a hilarious misadventure. In season 3, Chuck learned to punch people, which upset some fans, but most of us welcomed the change, saying it added a new element to the show. All of this lead up the epic finale of season 3, which would have been a perfectly good ending. NBC wanted to end it there, but the protests of fans, myself included, lead to renewal. God was that a mistake. Granted, it was nice to finally see Chuck and Sarah together, but we had that in season 3, and the first half of season 4 was good but not great, but then it fell of a cliff into a pit of lava. The show quickly devolved into basically a lighter Alias ripoff, becoming increasingly ridiculous, unbelievable, corny, poorly-written, and just plain bad. Season 5 was so bad that I watched the first five minutes of the first episode, and just said "NO." I mean seriously, MORGAN having the Intersect?! Are you kidding me?! I ended up watching the finale out of a weird sense of obligation, and it only reinforced the idea that it should have ended with season 3.

2. The X Files
Network: FOX
Seasons: 9

The iconic adventures of FBI agents Mulder and Scully was at one point the best sci fi show on air. We got 7 awesome seasons of monster-of-the-week, along with the thrilling overall story of a government agency covering up aliens among us.

When it should have ended: Season 7. Granted, it became pretty clear after season 5 that the writers had no clue what they were doing anymore, but the show as good enough that we were able to ignore that fact. And then Mulder got abducted by aliens and would only be seen again is small doses. You take into acount that along with the facts that the show was now incapable of telling a good story, the overall arc no longer made sense, and we got a bunch of weak new characters. And don't even get me started on the finale.

1. The Office
Network: NBC
Seasons: 8 and counting

The awkward misadventures of the office drones over at Dunder Mifflin Paper Company in Scranton, PA, was at one point NBC's biggest source of profit. Who didn't love the hilarious antics of the crew.

When it should have ended: Season 5. The show was hilariously awkward for the first few seasons, funny in a different way for the next few, and then started to decline bit by bit from season 6 onward. Seasons 6 and 7 had a couple of good moments here and there, but they couldn't make up for the poor quality. And then Steve Carrel, the source of just about every good joke in the past two seasons, leaves, and with him, the show's quality. Season 8 had exactly one good episode, and it wasn't enough to give us some relief from the terrible of the other episodes. Robert California annoys a lot of people, and I'm honestly a bit scared of him. Overall, it's pretty obvious to me that season 5 was the last consistently funny season, and would have been better then let the show bleed to death slowly over the next three seasons. My only hope now is that NBC will put it out of it's misery already and not renew it for a ninth season. If you love The Office, let it go.

Rant: Killed off characters

A little warning: MAJOR SPOILERS FOR ALL SHOWS MENTIONED!!!!!!! If you haven't seen one of the shows mentioned, you might not want to read this or you will be spoiled. Or you can if you don't care. I originally wrote this as a top ten list, but I decided it would work better as a rant. So, a common practice among evil TV writers is to kill off characters we love. Or hate. Basically, they want to either generate an episode or an emotional response from the audience by having someone kick the bucket. Sometimes it's useful to help break the show down, redefine or reestablish the characters, and get things back on track, or at very least, to crank out a couple of plots and establish a new direction. And other times it just succeeds in pissing off fans and starting "save insert character here" internet campaigns.

Some notable examples of shows with killed off characters are:

Torchwood: After the deaths of Owen and Tosh in the season 2 finale, Russel T. Davies made it a point that from then on, someone would die every season finale. And so it was. In season 3's finale, Ianto died, much to the irritation of fans, as this was the favorite character of quite a few people because he was hilariously Ianto-ish. If you've seen the show you know what I'm talking about. And in season 4, which everyone hated, we had the death of new comer Ester, who everyone hated, so that didn't really get many people upset. But it started with the deaths of Owen, who died before and then got brought back to life as a walking talking corpse, and Tosh, who just got killed for no real reason actually. Either way, if there will be 5th season of Torchwood, which isn't too likely, the we're looking at a pretty small main cast.

Warehouse 13: It sort of starts in season 2 when they killed of Daniel Dickinson. Granted, we hadn't seen him in awhile, but he was important in season 1, so I say he counts. Then, season 3's finale saw them kill Mrs. Frederick, our favorite enigmatic old lady who keeps the warehouse alive, Steve, the recently introduced gay buddhist human lie detector who was universally accepted by fans, and of course HG Wells, the result of an experiment that asked: what if we take one of the greatest writers in history, make it so he's actually a woman (a really hot woman, too), a murderous nutjob, a super genius who actually invented time travel, and have her go from bad guy to good guy to bad guy to good guy to MARTYR in two seasons. There's a chance not all of these's deaths will be permanent, seeing how we're still waiting on season 4 for some answers, but either way, there's some serious blood on the surviving characters hands.

Whedonverse: Technically this is all four of Joss Whedon's shows (Buffy, Angel, Firefly, and Dollhouse) grouped into one category, but believe, the body count doesn't get much higher. Buffy and Angel had whole episodes dedicated to characters dying, from Joyce's death in The Body, one of the finest and most depressing hours of TV ever produced, to that of Winifred "Fred" Burkle, our favorite super hot super funny science geek in A Hole in the World. Of course, then you have Fred's dead body getting possessed by an ancient demon, a plot device used throughout the rest of Angel's time on air.  Plus, you have the martyrdom achieved by Jenny, Doyle, Wesley, Spike (he got brought back to life, though), Anya, Darla (that one's probably up for debate), Wash, Shepard Book, and none other than Buffy herself (she died twice, but got brought back both times, once by CPR, the other by an occult ritual.) Plus, the victim of circumstance incidents that saw Cordelia and Tara eat it. The bottom line: Joss is freaking evil!

Supernatural: Do I even need to explain it? Probably not. All that really needs to be said is "Eric Kripke is one evil writer." From John Winchester to Ash to countless others, Supernatural has become a show with a pretty high body count of recurring characters. It's obvious they're not gonna kill Sam or Dean anytime soon, just because the show wouldn't exist without them, but as for, let's say Bobby, perhaps, his days are always gonna be numbered.

The Walking Dead: This is the type of show that starts out with a large cast, and then spends quite a bit of time thinning the herd. And that is exactly what season 1 did, whether it be by having people eaten by Walkers or blown up by explosives or shot, people died, man. And of course, there's the infamous death of Shane, and few others, in season 2.

Sherlock: Moriarty ends up killing himself. Yes, I know he's a villain, but he was too awesome not to include. He does himself in to make sure Sherlock follows suit, thus completing his nefarious plot. It's a bit confusing, though.

There you have it: my complete rant on characters who get done in by writers. My favorite characters always seem to die, so I guess I needed to make this rant. Bye for now. But wait, there's more! Anyone up for a few epic death scenes:

Episode Reviewed: Grimm: The Thing With Feathers

So, Nick and Juliette attempt to go on a romantic weekend trip, attempt being the operative word. They run into some trouble with two vessin neighbors, with husband, a cat-thing, abusing the wife, a thing with feathers. Some old school WB fans might recognize the wife from either Smallville season 1 or Buffy season 7. The wife is also literally about to give birth to a clod of gold. Yes, I'm being completely serious. Juliette notices the apparent abuse, and Nick has to step in to make sure no one dies. In other events, Adalin's love spell is taking affect on Hank, much to the Captain's pleasure. Not sure how he plans on using Hank, exactly, but I'm sure we'll find out. Wu's appetite continues to grow stranger as we see him eat a paperclip. Not sure how this'll get worked into the overall story either, but the writers aren't just going to set something like this up and not give us any answers. Even on LOST they gave us answers. They just didn't make much sense. Also, Monroe and Rosalie seem to be getting pretty close, and we find out Rosalie's late brother might have been a bit more then just another tea shop owner. This was a good standalone overall, not quite as good as some of the others have been, but entertaining none the less. It was also refreshing to see Juliette NOT act rather 2 dimensionally. You actually see fire a gun. Not saying she's the next great female badass, but she seems more like a real person now. Final Rating: 87%

Episode Reviewed: Touch: Kite Strings

Alright, I know it's been awhile since my last post, but I'm still here. You can't keep a good blogger down. So, this week on Touch, Martin and Jake are lead by a runaway kite to an old friend of Martin's wife, Sarah. Martin didn't know anything about this guy, though, and early on it's implied that Martin's marriage might not have been very solid. We also have some plot elements carried over from the pilot episode, most notably with the guilt-ridden, lottery-winning ex-firefighter who let Sarah die as he gets a sign after meeting a broken-down preacher. Plus, the Iraqi comic in training Abdul pays us another visit as we see him getting ready for an audition in front of some American soldiers, one of whom, a friend of his, is late as her convoy gets ambushed. This was an improvement over the last two episodes, as the A and B plots get more emotional and more engaging, and I doubt we've seen the last of the ex-firefighter. Sadly, we did not have an appearance by the magic phone. The ending, as usual, sweetens the episode quite a bit. I suppose it is possible the show is starting to lean a bit more towards melodrama, given the fact that the best two episodes have a been a mite melodramatic, and I'm actually fine with that just as long as it's done well, and the endings still give that nice feeling they have so far. Final Rating: 89%

Recap: March

New feature: recaps, in which I sum up all events related to a subject up to a point. It can be for both TV shows or for a month. In this case, I'm summing up all the TV and movie events I was privy to this March.
Warning: Spoilers!

On TV:
Grimm continued to be awesome this month, delivering three solid episodes: Three Coins in a Fuschbau, which delved into the shows mythology a bit more with three gold coins from ancient times that bestow the carrier with powerful but very aggressive behavior. It also had the biggest HOLY CRAP!!!! moment in quite some time by revealing that Adolf Hitler was a vessin. Plumed Serpent proved to be a good storyline involving dragon-type vessin, which provided us with a chance to see a very attractive Danielle Panabaker and for Monroe to nerdgasm multiple times. The most recent episode, Island of Dreams, gave us three potential mini-arcs for the remainder of the season involving Wu eating cushions, the manipulation of Hank by Adalin and the nefarious Captain Renard, and new player coming to town by way Rosalee. It was a good month for the new fantasy/horror hit.

Touch had it's second and third episodes, neither of which stacked up with the pilot, but I think the show still has some potential.

30 Rock has been busy being 30 Rock. 'Nough said.

We also got some news involving the long awaited 7th season of Doctor Who, half of which will air in fall 2012, the other half in winer 2013. Amy and Rory will serve as the Doctor's companions for the first 5 episodes, one of which will include a trip to the old west, possibly involving a Dalek. Then, the Ponds will exit heartbreakingly after one final encounter with the Weeping Angels, and not everyone is gonna make it out alive. Does this mean Rory is going to die permanently?!!? Then, in the Christmas special, the Doctor gets in new companion, played by Jenna Louise Coleman. We don't know much about her yet, beyond she's hot and the Doctor has finally met someone who can talk faster than him, meaning that this is not an ordinary girl, even by the Doctor's standards. And of course we'll River Song, and possibly the long awaited visit from Captain Jack. The season will be less serialized then season 6 (boo!) and will have no two part episodes, but 14 standalone episodes that Moffat claims will be like 14 blockbuster movies. Moffat also claims that while serialization will be reduced from last season, there will still central story arc to the season, possibly involving the new companion.

Let it also be noted that I have started watching the Walking Dead. I know a ton of people who love it, and with season 3 about six months away, I figured now would be a good time to catch up on the first two seasons. I'm finished with season 1, and it is FREAKING AMAZING!!!!! Ideally, I'll be done with season 2 in time for my fall TV season review in a few months. The bottom line, it is probably one of the best sci fi shows on TV right now, and really one of the best shows currently on period. I'm serious, I think it's tied with Sherlock for best show currently airing.

At the movies:
March is usually a very weak month for movies, demonstrated by the fact I only saw one in theaters: John Carter. And it was kinda terrible. I did, however, rent both Alien and Donnie Darko for some reason, and I loved both of them.

That is my March recap.